Bravery #5 bummed me out

I had an awesome blog written for today, and then…my computer at work crashed.

It’s that kind of day. I’m now on my phone, and if course there is no way to recreate my previous witty-ness…but oh well.

Brave thing number 5 made me feel sort of downtrodden, and it’s too bad. I think it’s maybe just the day in general but here goes.

So my employer has a rockin’ 401k program. I have not been a participant till an hour ago. The reason this is crummy is something to the tune of about 40k. *grimace and palm to forehead.

I can only say that I was a broke college student when I started here, and for the next roughly 2130 days since then (almost 6 years for those without a calculator) I told myself I would do it tomorrow.

“Tomorrow” ended up being today cuz I can’t pass up any more money! My employer matches my contribution 200% up to my 6% of my annual pre-tax pay. Yes, please do slap me for waiting so long. Now, since I’m not fully vested unless I’ve been contributing for 5 years, I’ll have to either stay that long, or only take my portion when/if I pack my desk and depart. *sniff sniff*

I’m mostly upset because I’m not exactly in love with my job or the company I work for. It’s not the same company that hired me, it’s less employee fuzzy-friendly than it used to be. The morale is low, and the job is more than a little stressful. I’ve been essentially failing at it since before I got pregnant. Now, because I have other things that drive me and keep me here, but also make it hard to go to work, it’s my biggest soul sucking activity that I regularly do.

*deep breath* I enrolled today to help myself down the path I need to take for now till I take a different one. I won’t be 30-something forever, and I don’t want my kid to have to be the one to wipe drool off of my chin and change my depends when I’m past doing those things for myself.

Despite now taking $200 less a month home, it was the brave and right thing to do. We will find a way to pay everything monthly and still eat.

Now I’m going to go find a king size candy bar. The brave starting of a new diet that doesn’t involve chocolate can wait for another day.

**Now I have one more thing to watch! The stock market! (smirk)***

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